The office kitchen at work is not like the kitchen in most workplaces. It is stocked with snacks, fruit, drinks of all shape and size among other things. Treats as far as the eye can see.
Because I long to eat better but lack the will to follow through with it, stuff like Zevia sugar free soda is perfect for me. It’s sugar free but comes in some interesting flavors and the “mouthful of loose change” aftertaste isn’t so bad. I can improve my health* by doing less than nothing. It’s almost too easy.
I like Zevia’s root beer version and the black cherry flavor. Sometimes I’ll fuck with DR. ZEVIA because I admire the hustle.
When those flavors are out of stock, I generally bypass the can o’poison in favor of a glass of water. Sometimes there’s a blue can that I don’t really bother with because the sprite variant doesn’t really do it for me.
Except the blue can isn’t “lemon lime” or cream soda or 7 Up or even soda water. It’s COLA flavor. But the can is blue so I went on assuming it was any other flavor.
Because cola is red. Because my brain and soul were bought and sold years ago.
Cola = red. Sorry, Pepsi. You had a good run.